Companions of Circumstance
by Skullblade
Summary: Have you ever heard the story of Team 2? Well, of course you haven't! Who would want them in the history books? Major focus on OCs, 'Possible' OOCness...
1. The Lord of Perverts!

_**Companions of Circumstance**_

**_A/N: This is a remake of The Lone Ninja, because I am a bad writer and wrote myself headfirst into a wall. It hurts, I tell you. For TLN Veterans: All the teams are what they are in Naruto now, but Enaku, Hana, Hishou, and Ryumura are now Team 2. Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, but I DO own Enaku, Hishu, Hana, and Ryumura. Jack J. Williams, Ryu Kenshin, Amanada, and Rama Ayama belong to Spidey3000, though they are not physically described in this chapter._**

**_Text Guide:_**

**_POV Change_**

_Non POV thoughts_

**Jutsu and Sound Effects**

**_Iruka's POV_**

It's such a normal day... so why do I suddenly have a very bad feeling? ...Oh, who am I kidding? It's Graduation day. The most chaotic day of the year... and I don't even have the team assignments done yet!

...I already got Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke safely with Kakashi... Kiba, Hinata, and Shino are in Kurenai's capable hands... The Dunce Tea- I mean Choji, Ino, and Shikamaru are in the equally qualified hands of their babysitte- Asuma... KoffjackryuamandawithramaKoff...

Oh dear Kami, I forgot those three! The little pervert Keri Enaku... the airhead Wakizashi Hana... and Ryu Hishou... What Jonin is left? I guess I'll have to look at who applied this year...

Oh Da- darn. Why him, of all people, why did it have to be Yami Ryumura?!

Well, I guess I have no choice... We have this year's Team 2 has been formed... why did I get the feeling lightning struck as I said that?

...Well, I guess there's no one else to assign... I mean, we only have 15 students, right?

**_Chapter 1_**

**_The Stalker, The Illusionist, and The Firestarter_**

A boy sat at his seat, crouching heavily into his desk, scribbling something on a piece of paper. The boy wore a black jacket, over a white shirt with the Konoha leaf on it, and also had bandages down his arms. His hair was brown, and as messy as if he just woke up. "Carry the 2... that goes there..."

A girl suddenly walked up behind him. "Hi, Enaku. What are you drawing?" The boy looked up in insane delight.

"This is my latest plan to get together with Hinata-hime! It's an ingenious idea, brought about by a dream, in which-"

The girl zoned out at this point. She wore a green shirt, with sleeves that went down past her hands. She also wore a skirt that matched her shirt, but with slits down the side, with dark brown shorts underneath. Her hair was long, and was a bright, unnatural green.

"-And that's what the monkey's for! Hana, what do you think of my plan?" Hana smiled, and clapped.

"You're best plan yet!"

A calm, cool, collected voice came from behind them. "Another of your idiotic, creepy stalker plans, eh, Enaku?"

A sound akin to hissing issued forth from Enaku's mouth. "Hishou." Hishou stood taller than Enaku, with spiky, black hair. He wore a dark blue vest, with a fishnet shirt under that. His black slacks clung tightly to his legs.

"Yes, Hish, and what of it?"

Hishou did a ridiculously camp hand gesture. "Really, Enaku, do you honestly think Hinata wants your attention? Right, girls?" A crowd of girls materialized out of nowhere, with what seemed to be the sole purpose of agreeing with Hishou.

"If you _really_ want to know, I honestly don't think she does."

"From the way you act, It seems like you do-" He was cut off my a bandaged hand suddenly socking him in the face.

The front door to the class slammed shut, Iruka standing in front of it. "Enaku, I saw that!"

"Iruka-sensei!"

"Be glad you'll never be seeing me again, because you'd have gotten dentention. Now, shut up so I can give you your assignments!" He looked at his assignment sheet. "Naruto, who somehow passed, The fangir- Sakura, and the assho- Sasuke are now Team 7, under Hatake Kakashi!"

Naruto was banging his head against the desk, Sakura was cheering loudly, and Sasuke was doing his best Gendo Ikari impression.

"The fa- Choji, the bi- Ino, and the lazy bum... are now Team 10, under Sarutobi Asuma!"

Choji was stuffing his face with chips, Ino glaring evilly at Sakura's head, and Shikamaru was fast asleep on his drool-covered textbook.

"The dog-boy, the bug kid, and the winter coat girl are now Team 8, under Yuhi Kurenai."

"Kami- fu!?ing- dammit!"

"Enaku, watch your langauge!"

Kiba was whispering to Akamaru, Shino... was doing something, and Hinata was glaring evilly at Sakura's head.

"Finally, we have the kid who stalks Hinata-" A noise that sounded roughly like a dying bird came from Enaku's seat. "Hana-" Humming could be heard from next to the dying bird sound. "and the cool guy Hishou, are now Team 2, under Yami Ryumura, Kami bless your souls."

Iruka's announcement of Team 11 was obscured by a very loud scream. "WHY HISHOU! I'm so much better than him!"

"Enaku, I don't know exactly how this is possible... but your grades are worse than Naruto and Shikamaru's combined."

Following great laughter from everyone (Except Hinata and Shikamaru... though he would if he could.), Iruka looked out into the class.

"You'll all wait here for your sensei to show up, so please, shut up, and try to get along with your teammates."

A random student held up his hand. "Iruka-sensei, what about the rest of us?"

"Holy shit, there are more than 15 of you."

**_Enaku's POV_**

Enaku glared at the front of the room, watching as several Jonin came in. Where the hell was this "Ryuwhatever"?! Ino, Shika, and Choji were already picked up by this guy I'm pretty sure was pedophile, Hinata went off with that brunette chick... those 3 people I know nothing about went with that guy who smelled like burnt tires and licorice... and, oddly enough, overripe fruit.

**_3 Hours Later_**

Enaku watched as this silver-haired fool ran off with Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke... and swore he heard Iruka mutter "Who the hell can be later than _Kakashi?!" _Where the hell is this guy?!

He heard Hana giggling somewhere next to him. And, much more horrifying, Hishou was snoring. Dear god, I need earplugs!

**_Normal POV (Yes, Enaku narrates himself in the 3rd person)_**

Enaku had been glaring intently at Iruka for the last 3 hours, which was really starting to creep him out. Though not nearly as much as Hishou sawing logs... though not _nearly _as cool as the Log that plagues Sasuke.

Suddenly, from nowhere, random fireworks went off, followed by epic drum music. From the center of the smoke, a silhouette appeared. "Ladies, gentleman, and Iruka! May I present to you, Yami Ryumura!" Spotlights suddenly blasted on the silhouette, which was revealed to be a man wearing standard Jonin uniform. "I am man who walks the night, I'm the one who makes woman swoon!" He started hopping on one leg. "I am the defender of all that is just, I'm the guy who owns the hot springs!" He did a little spin before settling in a show-stopping pose. "I am Yami Ryumura, Lord of Perverts!" He did a smug grin. _"Cue the thunderous applause."_

Enaku had a look on his face like Sasuke had suddenly danced into class wearing a tutu. Iruka just looked pissed. Hishou... was still asleep.

**CLAP! CLAP! CLAP! **"Great performance, sensei!" Hana grinned at Ryumura.

Ryumura stroked his stubble. "Thanks! It took me 4 hours to set up the smoke machines, the stereo, and the lights!" A sound like a dying animal came from behind him.

"Are you saying you were the first Jonin here?!"

"...Maybe."


	2. First Impressions

**_First Impressions_**

"..." Ryumura stared at his students from the safety of a tree.

"Erm... _sensei_, what exactly are you doing?"

Ryumura sighed. "To be honest, I've never really dealt with kids before. This is my first year that I signed up for this. Do any of you have any idea?"

"My sister said something about 'likes and dislikes, hobbies and dreams', or stuff like that? Maybe we're supposed to share something about ourselves." Enaku grinned eagerly at finding out something about the new teacher.

"... Yeah, that sounds about right. Fine, you on the left, start!" He pointed at Hishou.

Hishou grinned straight at his teacher. "I am Ryu Hishou. I like my 249 fangirls, I hate Sasuke for having more than me, and my dream is to learn how the Hyuugas have made their hair indestructable."

Ryumura nodded. "A worthwhile dream indeed... Now! It's your turn girl!"

"Why do you look like Solid Sna-"

"It's your turn boy!"

Enaku smiled. "I'm Enaku! I love Hinata-hime! I like Hana, Choji, and Naruto because they don't think I'm creepy... well, mostly... I hate Hishou, he brings darkness to the world, and he is pure evil!"

Hishou, as he does, fell asleep during this short rant. Hana started poking him. "He looks so cute when he's sleeping, doesn't he?"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"...Why did they stick me with the weirdos?"

"Anyway, I became a shinobi mainly because my father wanted me to, I heard he's a pretty big guy in Konoha..."

"And what would your father's name be?"

"Keri Enraku!" Never before had a single name had this much effect. Ryumura fell from his tree perch, nearly breaking his neck in the process. This actually caused Hishou to wake up, a stunned look on his face.

"Keri Enraku, Head of the Konoha Medical Corps?" Ryumura was nearly having a seizure on the ground. He struggled to open his mouth.

"Enrakuしなければならない理由は？彼は私の娘を盗むのに、私が嫌悪感を抱いている敵と試みた

"Speak Japanese, Sensei!" Enaku gave him a couple slaps.

"Erm... sorry. By contrived coincidence, Enraku happens to be my old teammate (My very scary teammate...)"

"WHAT?! How would you not know the last names of your own new squads?!"

"Erm...

**_Flashback no Justu!_**

The Third Hokage stared out into the full room of Jonin. "Today, we will be giving you your assignments for Genin. Kakashi, you will lead Team 7, consisting of Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, and Uchiha Sasuke."

"I guess that's fair." The masked man didn't look away from his questionable reading material.

"Kurenai, you will lead Team 8, consisting of Inuzuka Kiba, Hyuga Hinata, and Aburame Shino."

"I won't let you down, Hokage-sama."

"Asuma, you will lead Team 10, consisting of Akimichi Choji, Yamanaka Ino, and Nara Shikamaru."

"I get the Ino-Shika-Cho Trio Part 2, huh?"

"ramayouleadteam11consistingofjackjwilliamsamandaryukenshin"

A noncommital grunt came from the corner.

"And Yami Ryumu- Where's Ryumura?!"

**_End Flashback no Jutsu_**

Enaku had an eyebrow raised. "Wait, how could you flashback to something you weren't there for-"

"MOVING ON! Anyway, introductions aren't important. Now, in order to pass my test-"

"What test?!"

"The test that determines whether you become actually Genin or not. Didn't I mention it?"

"NO!"

"Oh, well... I did now. Anyway, the test is a simple survival excersise, which will take place at this training ground tomorrow, at 7 P.M. Any questions?"

Hana raised her hand. "You never answered the tree question from before."

"The answer to that is something that your fragile mind is better off not knowing. So I'll tell you anyway!"


	3. Logged, Baka

_**The Test**_

"...and that's why I hate Santa with a passion." Ryumura looked at his students and grinned. Hana was staring at him in bored interest. Enaku had started twitching, and was foaming at the mouth a little. Hishou... was snoring, as usual.

"Now that that story is out of the way, I believe we had at test to torture... I mean... yeah, torture you with. The test will begin in 3...2...1..." He started to vanish.

Enaku snapped out of his stupor. "Wait, you never told us what the test was!"

Ryumura instantly solidified. "I never did, did I? Huh. Fine! Explanation time!" He pulled out two bells from his pocket. "This is a test I stole... borrowed from Kakashi."

Hana raised her hand."

"Yes, girl?"

"Wasn't the test supposed to be tomorrow?"

"Screw that! The test is to steal one of these bells from me, but be warned! The one of you who does not get a bell goes without lunch!"

"Lunch was an hour ago."

"You will go without dinner! Ready? Begin!"

Almost immediately Enaku leapt at Ryumura. He got a log to the face for his trouble. Ryumura grinned at him from a tree. "What do you think you're doing, Keri? You won't get a bell that way!" He suddenly looked wary. "Why are you grinning? Why do I smell burning? WHY AM I STANDING ON AN EXPLOSIVE TAG?!"

Enaku watched the explosion with satisfaction. "You see, while you were distracted telling that story, I stuck a tag up there!" The smoke started to disappear. "Huh?" An object burst out of the smoke cloud, right at Enaku's face.

"Logged, baka!"

Hishou glanced at the unconscious Enaku. "...Log?"

"It takes more than a simple explosive tag to bring me down! It takes a lot more firepower than that!"

Hishou smiled. "I can oblige that."

"Huh?"

Hishou took up a fighting stance. "_**Kasai Kobushi**_!"

Ryumura stared in shock. "DID YOUR HANDS JUST CATCH FIRE?!" He ducked as Hishou's fist flew over his head.

"I have a special ability, sensei. I can control flame, and combine it with Taijutsu. It adds a bit more _fire_ to my attacks!"

Ryumura dodged a swing to his chest. "I'm going to have to punish you for that lame pun. Was it even a pun?" He grinned. "Marui Seki Ashige Ahou!" He did a roundhouse kick, cracking Hishou's leg.

Hishou clutched his leg. "You... you actually broke my leg?! I can't move properly on this!"

"Very well, 2 genin down... 1 to go!" He turned to find Hana. He found her and Enaku missing. "Dammit! Well, I can still kick you in the face, boy-" He turned to find Hishou gone. "Well, crap."

**Somewhere In Enaku's Mind**

"Ugh... where am I?" Enaku glanced around at the barren landscape. For some reason, everything was pink, except for a bright green leafless tree right in front of him. And sitting in the tree was a large, black bird.

"Okay, what's with the giant bird?"

"I am your Spirit Guide TM. Allllrrright?"

"What the hell? Who are you?!"

"My name is Senora Acotillo Vensaval. Now hush, I don't have much time. Listen to these words, for they will be the most important in your life. Usa tu poder de elite!" Everything started fading to black.

"Wait! I don't speak French!"

"Usa tu poder de elite!"

**In The Training Grounds**

"Enaku, please wake up."

"I DON"T SPEAK FRENCH!" Enaku blinked blearily around him.

Hishou glared at him with disdain. "Hana, how exactly was he supposed to help us again?"

"Enaku, Hishou has a broken leg, could you help me fix it?"

Enaku nodded sleepily. "Wrap a splint around it. Use a straight piece of wood and tear clothing in an emergency. That's the most an amateur can achieve, so we'll have to find better medical expertise later."

Hishou raised an eyebrow. "A surprisingly good answer, and no declarations of my evil?"

"His father is a doctor, and that's also why I asked him while he was still delirious."

Enaku looked around suddenly. "What the hell is going on?" Hana quickly stepped in between him and Hishou.

"I think I've figured something out, but we need a plan. Can you make one that involves all 3 of us?"

"YOU EXPECT ME TO WORK WITH THE EVIL-"

"Please, Enaku-kun?" She gave him an extremely innocent face.

"Okay! But first, I have to know, Hish. Can you project the fire away from your body?"

**A little bit away from here**

Ryumura was squinting in a random direction, as if he had seen something. They always did it in the movies.

"Ryumura-sensei! I have come to defeat you!"

Ryumura turned to face the disturbance. He smiled when he saw it was Enaku. "Haven't you already learned that you can't beat me?"

Enaku grinned back at him. "Oh, I know that. That's why I'm distracting you while Hana steals the bells."

_-jingle-_

Ryumura swung around to face Hana, who was holding the bells triumphantly. She made a move to throw one toward Enaku.

Ryumura barely thought, he just knew he had to stop Enaku from getting the bell. But before he could...

"**Hadoken!**" Ryumura back flipped over the ball of fire heading at him, and he realized, right when he landed, that Hishou was crouching in front of him, but he couldn't figure out why...

"**Shoryuken!**" His fist connected with Ryumura's jaw, propelling him upwards. Enaku jumped at him, reaching for Ryumura's pocket.

A sudden dawning of realization came too late. "The bells I used don't jingle!" Ryumura hit the ground as Enaku handed a bell to Hishou. The students beamed down at their sensei. He just glared up at them.

"You used a genjutsu to make me think she had taken the bells, used Hishou's attacks to make me think it was to keep her from giving you a bell, so you could steal the real, now invisible to me bells?"

"Yes."

"I hate you all." He jumped into a back flip to get back to a standing position.

"Was that physically possible?"

"What made you work together, anyway?" Enaku grinned at him.

"My sister is part of a 3-Man cell."

"Fair enough. Well, you all pass. Go home. Tell your parents."

Hishou frowned at him. "Sensei, are you sulking?"

"LEAVE!" They scattered like roaches.

**The Jonin Break Room**

Ryumura had been glaring at a wall for the past hour. He had just fallen for an extremely simple plan. Nothing could make this day worse now.

"Ryumura! I'd like a word with you!" Well, except that. He leaned back to look at the doorway behind him.

A man wearing a white, long coat, with the standard Jonin uniform under it stood there. His brown, bespectacled eyes shined. His boyish good looks brought Ryumura's blood to a cold stop.

"Oh... crap."

Dr. Keri Enraku had come.


	4. Mission Blues

**The First Mission**

"Ryumura! I can't believe they choose you to be Enaku's sensei!" Ryumura looked on in horror. Enraku had a face that radiated pure joy. "I haven't seen you for... how long was it?"

"I saw you last week. You removed that fork from my thigh."

Enraku laughed. "Rukia acting up again, huh? What was it last time?"

"The rice bowl. It was in my kidney. How do you forget about that?!"

"I remove a lot of things from a lot of people. Anyway, old man, I'm taking you out to eat, we need to catch up on old times!" Enraku grabbed Ryumura by the back of the vest and dragged him toward the door. Ryumura gave a pleading look toward the other 3 jonin in the room.

Unfortunately for him, what he had to work with was Anko, Gai, and Hayate. Anko just smiled at him in that creepy way of hers. Damn sadist!

Hayate gave him a look that said "Sorry, but he controls my medicine."

Gai just opened the door for Enraku. "Huzzah, it is Youthful to remember times with friends!!!"

Ryumura glared at him. "If you were youthful, you wouldn't have times to remember..."

**Ichiraku Ramen**

Enraku grinned at Ryumura. "Remember when we first came here?"

Ryumura could at least be fond of this memory. "Right after we became genin, wasn't it? Chikan-sensei(may she rest in peace) treated us to celebrate the success of our first mission... catching that damn cat!"

"Real accomplishment, that was. You going to treat your team after your first mission?"

"Probably. It depends on whether I like my team then or not."

"You don't like them?"

"The boy punched me in the jaw with a fist that was on fire. I don't know if the hairs on my beard will ever grow back. The girl fooled me with a simple illusion. Your boy planned all that, after he made me stand on an explosive tag. What's there not to like?"

"You should have seen what my team did to me. I was electrically charged for weeks! Couldn't actually do my job... kept shocking the patients..."

"Chikan-sensei didn't come out on top during our test, either. Between Rukia punching her in the face, you using your chakra scalpels... me distracting her by turning into a naked Jiraiya..."

"I think you caused the most lasting damage."

Ryumura starting eating his ramen, just in time for an awkward question. "So, Ryumura... when you planning... on getting married?" Ryumura spit out his burning hot ramen into Enraku's face.

"I've told you before, Rukia and I are not getting married. At least, not anytime soon. The only person who got married young was you..."

Ryumura quickly realized his mistake. The tears were already welling up in Enraku's eyes. Shit, he had brought up Konata. Uh...uh... how to stop this before it starts... He suddenly pointed behind Enraku. "Look, it's Enaku making out with a random girl!"

Enraku spun around faster than you could say 'doc'. "Enaku isn't over there... what was I talking about again?"

"Enraku, I know you, and you would never kidnap me just to talk about old times. What is this really about?"

Enraku looked sheepish. "I was waiting to tell you this later, but... I know what your first mission is!"

"How would you know that?!"

"Hokage-sama rambles on during his physicals."

"Ew."

"I know, right? Anyway, I think you'll enjoy it!"

"Just spill it already!" Enraku leaned close to Ryumura and started whispering. Ryumura gave him a long, hard look, and simply stated:

"Oh hell no."

** Later, at The Mission Assignment Center**

The new Team 2 stood gathered in the MAC. They had all switched out their previous outfits for new, genin worthy ones.

Enaku wore a dark green vest, with a white shirt with the number 4 underneath it. He now wore khaki pants, and his new headband was strapped across his forehead.

Hishou wore a brand new blue coat, with the bottoms stylishly tattered. His still wore his fishnet shirt under it, and also wore black pants. His headband was currently keeping his spiky hair up.

Hana wore a new green shirt, with blue shorts with white triangle around the hems. She wore her headband across her waist like a belt. A wakizashi was strapped to her back. She had also gotten a haircut, he green hair now just slightly below her ears.

Enaku stared at his sensei. His face had been stuck in an angry snarl for 10 minutes now. Every so often he emitted a sound like a cross between a growl and a sigh.

"Sensei, are you all right?"

"Hhhrrruuhhh."

The Hokage looked confusedly at Ryumura. He couldn't possibly know what his mission was, could he? The only one he told was his doctor, but he had an excellent record for doctor-patient confidentiality... ah well, he'll chalk it up to Ryumura being like that one councilman, who knows everything.

He cleared his throat. "I am happy to inform you that I am now assigning you your first mission! Team 2's goal is to..."

**Several Minutes Later**

The cat known as Tiger stalked through the streets, just waiting for the onslaught it knew was inevitably coming. Suddenly he knew it was time. The four figures staring at hi from down the street were definitely it.

The shorter boy was grinning at him, making those damn annoying 'come here boy' movements with his hands.

The other boy just stared impassively at the fool, not really caring about Tiger at all.

The girl was just smiling at Tiger, so much more kindly than most of them do...

Tiger froze. He _knew _the 4th figure. Sure, he was older than then, he was taller than before, and he had more hair on his face, but it was _him._

Memories of a chase long since passed flashed through Tiger's mind. In the present, the man had a disgruntled look on his face.

_**Team 2 POV**_

__Ryumura glared at the cat. This thing should have been an S-Rank! He quickly thought of plans, before just throwing them out mentally. What would Chikan-sensei do?!

Ryumura broke out in a grin as he remembered exactly what his sensei did.

Enaku turned to Ryumura when his cat calls proved less than successful. "Ryumura-sensei, what are we going to do?"

Ryumura shook his head smugly. "We aren't doing anything. You are going to catch."

Enaku nearly popped a blood vessel. "You're our sensei! You're supposed to help us with missions!"

"My sensei just stuck those weird sunglasses of hers on her face, sat on a nearby rooftop, watched and laughed her ass off. Exactly what I'm doing!" He did the standard Jonin teleport, leaving behind only a note that said 'good luck' on it and a odd drawing of a grinning Ryumura.

Enaku stared at the note speechless. He shook it off and turned to his teammates. "So, guys, what is our plan?"

Hishou smirked. "This mission is beneath me. It's more fitting for common folk like you."

"Says the guy whose leg is still broken."

Hishou sputtered incoherent words of rage. Enaku just turned to his best friend and teammate. "Hana?"

"Cats say meow, unless it's a dog."

Enaku sighed. "Guess it's just me, huh?" Enaku faced the cat, who was still watching out of morbid curiosity. "Cat, it's time to go back home!"

Tiger hissed at him. Enaku just walked up to the cat, and picked him right up. "Wow, that wasn't so hard..."

Ryumura, watching from a rooftop, was rapidly eating a mysteriously acquired bucket of popcorn in anticipation.

_**SWISH! TEAR! SQUISH! THUD!**_

__Enaku stared in horror at the cat who was currently embedded by the claw into his skull, having cut through his headband and flesh to do so.

**Several seconds later**

Tiger ran in terror across the village rooftops from the scratched, bruised, enraged, and bleeding heavily from the forehead ninja. His torn and bloody headband was gripped tightly in his left hand.

"You're not getting away from me you goddamn rat!" Enaku pulled out a explosive-tagged kunai, and threw it at the cat in hopes of making it lose it's footing. Unfortunately, he missed his mark. It was now right by his own feet.

The explosion was heard throughout the village. Luckily, it didn't vaporize Enaku, and merely blew him clear. Unluckily, it blew him clear over the edge of the roof. Luckily, he managed to grab the roof edge with a bandage-wrapped hand. Unluckily, what he saw standing above him while he squinted through the blood chilled his heart.

Tiger was standing by his hand, ridiculously sharp claws poised over it. "Now, cat, we both know you don't want to do that."

_**SWISH!**_

Enaku cursed the cat as he fell down into the street, crashing right through the roof of Ichiraku's Ramen, face landing in the boiling hot, _salty_ ramen being made.

**Elsewhere**

Tiger glared at the blue cloaked, spiky haired boy currently staring at him. "Now that Enaku has failed spectacularly, I can one up him and get the glory for this mission." Hishou started running at the cat, who yawned lazily at him. Suddenly, a flash of claws raked into the flesh of Hishou's broken leg, and brought him to his knees. Another flash of claws and Hishou was grasping his face in agony. Breathing heavily, he looked upwards at his reflection in a nearby shop window.

"MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!" Hishou then fainted, having lost several of his fangirls.

**On a rooftop**

Ryumura grinned at the 2 idiots that were now his job to watch. He hadn't been this entertained for years! He's lost track of Hana, as well as the cat, but what did that matter. However, a sound behind him soon brought his joy to and end. "What?"

Ryumura turned around to fix his yellow eyes on the intruder. "So, we meet again."

"Meow."

"I assume you want revenge?"

"Meow."

"I thought as much." Ryumura and Tiger stared at one another, Ryumura's longer than normal headband billowing dramatically in the wind. He slowly reached toward his sleeve to pull it up, revealing the weapon seal wrapped around his arm.

"I knew it would come to this one day." He activated the seal, grabbing the katana that it held, readying it into a fighting stance.

"Meow."

"Come on! BRING IT! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!"

**Later**

Hana climbed up to the rooftop, where she found Tiger lying fast asleep on Ryumura's chest, massive puddle of blood spread out beneath him. She smiled at the cat, and held out her arms. "Come on, Tiger, time to go home." The cat stood up sleepily, walked over to her and jumped into her arms.

**At the MAC**

A large woman, currently clutching a resigned cat to her chest, smiled gratefully at her heroes. "How can I ever thank you!?"

Ryumura, who, despite his frightening number of injuries, had elected to just use a simple pair of crutches to get around, growled angrily. "No thanks is necessary, my Lady." This was said more like "F U and Die."

Hishou was clutching his legs, sitting in the fetal position in the corner, muttering insanely.

Enaku, sitting in a wheel chair, all four limbs set in casts, his face absolutely covered in burn dressings, bandages, and stitches, told her exactly how she could thank him. "Mmff Mmff, Umf Fomm Tem." Well, he told her something.

Hana smiled and bowed. "It was absolutely no trouble."

The cat owner smiled and walked out of the room. The Third Hokage cleared his throat. "Now, with that out of the way, it is time for your second mission!"

Enaku used much colorful language the old man couldn't make out. Ryumura happily translated.


	5. Tree Troubles

_**Tree Troubles**_

**Disclaimer: I do not own any characters found within, with the exceptions of Yami Ryumura, Keri Enaku, Wakizashi Hana, Ryu Hishou, and Keri Enraku, as well as newcomers Hyuuga Hayai, and "Pacchi-Kun".**

Ryumura gave his best yellow-eyed glare at the young med student prodding him with... _medical instruments._

The young, pale-eyed chunin healer cowered a little, visibly shaking, but did not retreat.

Enraku just shook his head and sighed. "Ryumura, I would appreciate if you didn't intimidate my learning medics."

Ryumura turned his glare on his 'best friend'. "You know I don't like any one other than you handling me medically. Besides, this one has the look of clumsiness about her.

The student flushed crimson, and started poking her fingers together.

Enraku just sighed again. "Hayai, would you mind stepping out for a minute?"

The young girl shook her head and ran out the door.

Ryumura smirked. "I never knew you had a Hyuuga student."

"She's new. However, I have high hopes for her."

Ryumura stared incredulously. "Her?!"

Enraku placed his palm on his face. "I'll have you know, she wasn't nearly this nervous when I interviewed her. It likely has something to do with you glaring at her like that. Are you waiting for the day you gain heat vision or something?"

"X-Ray vision, actually. But seriously, her?! What could she possibly have others don't?"

"For one, her knowledge was superb. Also, she actually has X-ray vision. Got her from the branch family."

Ryumura laughed. "Main family wouldn't give one up, would they?"

Enraku glared at him. "I kept saying Hinata would be perfect for Medical, but no, she's the heir, and can't make her own damn choices!" He slammed a fist against a wall. Ryumura backed up in alarm. If Enraku was angry, _it _couldn't be deep right now.

Enraku pulled a bottle out of his pocket, popped out a capsule, and swallowed it. He calmed down rapidly. "Right, what were we talking about?"

"Erm, the results of my check-up?"

"Right, right. Well, you're cleared for duty. May I ask how you managed impale your arm on a branch?"

"Enaku needs to learn that wood-gathering does not involve explosives. Branch would have killed him if it hit _him_."

A glint flashed in Enraku's glasses at the mention of his son. "Speaking of Enaku... I know your next mission!"

Ryumura groaned. Enaku wagged his finger at him. "This will be the Team's first mission outside of Konoha! It's an important, B-Rank, one too!"

"How could you possibly know that?!"

Enraku shook his head. "As you should remember, as Head of the Medical Corps, I am officially part of the Village Council."

Ryumura groaned louder than before. "The council seriously decided on us?! I thought you had to be recommended by at least 2 council members before they even considered you!"

Enraku grinned nervously. "Umm..."

"Don't worry, I know you were one of them. You put me up for all the fun missions." He smiled at his sometimes best friend. Suddenly, his grin turned suspicious. "Wait... no one else on the council likes me much, do they?"

Enraku chuckled. "You haven't kept up with the Council Roster since you became a Chunin! That was 17 years ago!"

Ryumura froze. "He wouldn't. He's not..."

"On the contrary. He is. Pacchi-kun actually voted for you before I did."

Ryumura had never heard the nickname before, but he could easily put a face to it. Gray hair, beard, looked about 55-ish, well-liked enough for people to actually call him that. Above all, the eye patch that gave him the nickname. "The old goat is a councilman?! Since when?!"

"Since he retired from active ninja duty 15 years ago."

Ryumura sighed. "I bet the decision was unanimous?"

"He's very charismatic, when I think on it."

"Very well. What's the mission?" Ryumura asked with dread.

_**Ichiraku Ramen**_

Enaku sighed. Ever since he'd healed, he's been helping out here at Ichiraku Ramen in his time off. He had to pay off that roof somehow. He knew that, if he had asked his father, he could have just given them money and be done with it. However, his sense of honor dictated that he pay it himself.

Ichiraku had been understanding, and so agreed with this arrangement. His acceptance was helped along by his daughter, Ayame, who told him she would appreciate the help, but really wanted it so she could get time off.

Now that he was here, he found that it wasn't that bad. If he hadn't been a ninja, he'd probably work somewhere like here...

If only the uniform weren't so embarrassing. The outfit itself wasn't terrible... it was when his classmates saw him in it. He thought on the reactions his fellow genin had shown.

Kiba had burst out in laughter when he saw him, and last Enaku had seen, he'd been carried to the hospital for a collapsed lung.

Shino had shown up for a bowl. He didn't really give a feeling that he actually noticed...

Hinata gave a soft 'eep', and bolted the minute she saw him working at the counter.

He thanked the heavens he never saw Ino. She was probably on a diet right now. One lettuce leaf every five days, by her usual dieting methods... and she wondered why she was in the hospital so often!

Strangely enough, only 2 people didn't seem to think it was weird. Choji had just given him an approving nod, and whispered something like "The food is strong in this one."

The other was Hana, who kept him company pretty much whenever he worked. She also seemed to really hit it off with Ayame.

Amazingly, he'd yet to see Naruto in the time he's worked there. Apparently he was on some mission in the Land of Waves. No one knew when he would be back. However, apparently when he'd be back was...

"Huh? Enaku! What are you doing in an Ichiraku's uniform?!" Enaku just pointed at the yet to be rebuilt roof.

"Fell through it." Enaku took in the odd sight. Not Naruto... well, he's odd, yes, but it was more of what Naruto had with him. "Naruto? Who's that?"

Naruto had with him the prettiest girl he's ever seen. Well, third prettiest, anyway. She was wearing an odd green outfit, and she had long, black hair. Though this isn't the odd part. No, the odd part was that she was wearing a Mist headband. Kiri and Konoha may not be enemies, but they weren't allies either.

Naruto grinned. "This is Haku!I'm showing her around the village! Haku, this is Enaku! He's the son of the guy I told you about!"

She looked a little unsure, but she nervously smiled. "It's... nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too. What's she doing with you, Naruto?"

Naruto grinned. "Well, Kakashi-sensei told me not to tell anyone yet, but..."

Naruto was suddenly cut off by Hishou's sudden appearance. "Ryumura wants us to meet him in Training Field 14 now. As in, right now."

Enaku sighed. "Naruto, I'll be sure to ask you about it later." He quickly ran to the back of the Ramen stand to retrieve his regular clothes.

**Konoha Hospital**

Enraku frowned grimly at the man laying before him. He shook his head before cradling his head in his hand. He looked to the silver-haired Jonin leaning against the wall.

Kakashi stared at him blankly. "Is there anything you can do for him?"

"It's a lot of wounds. He's in a coma. I can treat the wounds of the flesh. Wounds of the mind, however... did he give any reactions at all on the way back?"

"Only when we do one thing." Kakashi reached to pick up the huge sword lying next to the patient. The patient twitched a little.

Enraku nodded. "That's a good sign. He can feel you handling his sword. **(Accidental Innuendo? That didn't sound nearly as dirty when I wrote it.)** If he has any friends or family, tell them to visit tomorrow, after I put him through surgery."

"Thanks, Enraku."

"Enraku-san, Kakashi. I am your senior. What did you say his name was?"

"Momochi Zabuza."

"The Council is NOT going to like this.

**Training Field 14**

"This is a very simple exercise." Ryumura grinned at his team.

Enaku frowned and looked around at the forest they'd been brought to. "What exactly are we going to be doing?"

Ryumura shook his head. "I'm getting to that. We... are going to climb trees!"

He could see them struggling not to laugh. "Isn't that a little... primitive, sensei?"

Ryumura just grinned wider. "That's the interesting twist! You have to climb these trees... without using your hands!"

He watched their faces and could immediately tell what they(at least, Enaku and Hishou) were thinking. "Before you attempt to pelvic thrust your way up the tree, I'll show you the trick. Though that would have given me endless amusement."

He made a hand sign, stood still for a second, and placed a foot on the tree. Taking in their shocked faces happily, he placed the other foot on the tree and walked upwards. He stood upside down from a branch, and frowned at them. Being upside down, this meant he was smiling.

"You have to gather chakra in your feet and think... STICK! If you pour in too much chakra, you'll break the wood. If you use to little, you'll fall on your face. It shouldn't take more than a few minutes.

**A half-hour later...**

Ryumura grimaced at his team. None of them could complete the exercise. "Are any of you really trying? You're supposed to defy physics and walk up the tree!"

Enaku muttered irritably.

Ryumura coughed. "I'm sorry, I didn't catch that." Ryumura looked around warily. "Wait... where's Hana?"

"Hello sensei!"

Ryumura looked up, where Hana was waving at him from the top of the assigned tree. He turned back to the other two. "Are you two trying! Hana made it already!"

Hishou started twitching. "Why are we even doing this idiotic exercise!"

Enaku grinned at him. "You're only saying that because I got further up than you did!"

"It's not my fault, my tree keeps bursting into flame!"

Ryumura grunted angrily. "Hello? Forgot your sensei, huh! The one who's yelling at you? Fine! I'll tell you what this exercise is for! It's to build chakra control!"

"Why should we need to do that!"

Ryumura punched a tree in anger. "You want to see what perfect control can do, huh?!" He pulled down his sleeve to activate his weapon seal. A sword poofed into existence. "See this sword?"

Enaku and Hishou nodded. Ryumura suddenly swung the sword at a tree. It embedded itself a couple inches deep. "That's what I can do without chakra. Now see what happens when I add some Fuuton chakra. Balancing the chakra can make many things possible. Without it, it's a waste of chakra." He swung the blade again, slicing cleanly through the tree. His students looked in shock.

Mistaking their shock for being unimpressed, Ryumura's mouth started frothing. He was grinning manically. "Not impressive enough, huh!? See what happens when I add some Katon _and _Fuuton! _**Kaze Nenshou!**_"

**A short time later**

Breathing heavily, Ryumura was on the ground, nearly out of chakra. The massive swath of burning wood around him continued to smolder. "Forgot how much chakra that takes..." He turned to his students. "What are you waiting for? Climb the tree before I can move again, and I'll treat you to dinner! Most expensive dinner goes to whoever gets there first! Hana, could you help me up, please? My body is numb."

**Training Field**

Enaku was making some progress. Well, more than Hishou anyway, who couldn't get the trees to stop burning when he touched them. However, all this progress was lost about halfway up the tree.

Enaku started shouting toward Hana. "Hana, watch this! I can make it about halfway!" He started running up the tree with perfect control, until... he hit a hole. Which wouldn't be too bad, if it weren't for the fact that it was filled with squirrels. Very, very angry squirrels.

Hishou watched Enaku's mauling and rolled his eyes. He turned back to his tree, and put one foot on the trunk. It instantly burst into flame. "Damn!"

Ryumura was currently questioning why the gods had forsaken him.

**The Hokage's Office**

Hard at work at his desk, The Third Hokage stopped for just a moment as he heard the door open. He accidentally knocked his current book on the floor in his haste to stand up. "Pacchi-san! What brings you here today!"

The man's grin widened into a smile. "Hokage-sama, I know you're very busy. I'll make this brief. It was that mission we set Ryumura's team up for. I know you usually inform shinobi of their mission's personally, but I was wondering... would you mind letting me tell him?"

The Third shook his head. "Of course you can! You are vitally important to the mission, after all!"

The patched man bowed. "Many thanks, Hokage-sama. I will take my leave." Contrary to his claim, he was suddenly right next to the Hokage, a certain orange-covered book in his hand. "A little light reading, Hokage-sama?" He set the book down on the desk, and whisked toward the door, ignoring the Third's mumbling. He turned his head back and grinned. "I hear the next one comes out soon."

**Training Field 14**

Ryumura considered getting frustrated, but then thought of something. If he actually helped them... would that make him a better sensei than Chikan?

"Enaku."

The boy looked up from his current injured position. "Ryumura-sensei?"

"Try simply walking up the tree."

Enaku looked confused but followed his direction. To his utter astonishment, he managed to make it to the top.

Ryumura smirked in satisfaction. "You tried to show off too much. It was disrupting your chakra." He turned to Hishou. "Hishou, your problem is that you can't turn off the fire, right?"

Hishou nodded, confused.

Ryumura rapidly did a hand sign. "_**Doton: Yurasu Hashira no Jutsu!**_" He slammed his hand to ground, a pillar of rock forming in front of him roughly the size of one of the trees. "Try it on something nonflammable."

Hishou tentatively placed a foot on the rock, and to his delight, it didn't go up in flames. He was about to shout to the sky, but regained his composure. "Thank you, Ryumura-sensei!"

Watching this brought a smile to his lips. A few minutes later, he grinned wider.

"All 3 of you did it! I congratulate you, and now, it's off to lunch!" He turned around only to come face to face with an eye patch. "Agh! You!"

An elderly man in robes stood before him. The man's face was softened by a smile and a small amount of wrinkles, but that didn't hide the sharp edge that used to be there. His gray hair was interspersed with flecks of black, and it was kept short. His eye was closed, and it didn't look like he opened it often. He waved at the whole team.

"Hello, Team 2!"

Enaku, Hana, and Hishou stared, all 3 of them thinking they'd seen him somewhere before. Ryumura was sputtering incomprehensibly.

"My name is Pacchi-kun. I'm a member of the village council. "I'm also... your new mission! Though, gossip that he is, Enraku-kun probably already told Ryumura-san about it. Though judging from the rapidly whitening face, I'd say he didn't know my part in it."

Enaku looked at Ryumura. "What mission is he talking about?"

Before the stunned ninja had a chance to respond, Pacchi-kun continued. "You have an important B-rank mission. You guys are going to escort a diplomat to Takigakure, the Village Hidden in the Waterfall!"

Ryumura regained his voice, and he asked with dread. "Don't tell me...?"

"You will be escorting me! ...Now... did someone mention lunch?


End file.
